Geekquality’s New Year’s Prophecies for 2013

Well, folks, we made it through another year. Despite the Mayans reminding us to buy a new calendar, Earth continues to spin, as it has for the past few billion years. 2012 was one for the history books, even if there are parts of it that we’d really rather forget. Through the triumph and tragedy, we could always count on geek media and its creators to entertain, distract, outrage, and/or give us hope.

With that in mind, we asked around at the Geekquality New Year’s Eve party to see what folks thought 2013 would bring for escapism. Really, though, we’re not augurs and we’re fresh out of henges. Mostly, we just wing it. If we are right, though, you’re going to be seeing a lot of Lucy Liu in the next year. A lot of Lucy Liu.

Department of Televisionomancy

As you already know, we’re major TV junkies here at GQ. So it’s no surprise that most of what we’re wishing for in 2013 is happening on the small screen:

choyeun

Lois is clearly trying to kill us with sexy.

K-Drama expert and Twitter-maven Lois Payne looked up from her smartphone to tell us she hopes “for John Cho and Steven Yeun to get their own TV show. They can be brothers and date a lot, while dismantling the myth of the fragile Asian man.” Of course, for this to be the best possible timeline, Moxie would have to have a recurring role.

Meanwhile, our resident STEM professional, Production Coordinator and “Whicha!” whip cracker Mace would like nothing more than “a show about lady scientists who most of the time dress as is appropriate for the lab (no heels, jeans) but occasionally dress in a more cute fashion. And have emotions (unlike Bones) but are not out-of-control-hormonal stereotypical females.” Which, let’s face it, would be a show about Mace.

troyabed

Admit it, you’d watch “Troy and Abed Reading Phooooone-books!”

Contributing Editor and renowned Moffsandrist Alice Marie raised a mug (that may or may not contain coffee) to sing us a little jingle: “Troy and Abed in a SPIN-OFF!”

amisfitsworld

Time travel really screws with verb tenses. (via: amistfitsworld.tumblr.com)

Later, while bopping around to The Rapture’s Echoes, she confessed her fondest wish for British sleeper hit series Misfits“I just want for Alisha and Nikki and Curtis to come back to life and be great.”

uhura

(via: demotivation.us)

Moxie, Contributing Editor and Badass Femcee, had this to say before turning the volume on our stereo way, way up: “I want Nyota Uhura to save the world and sleep with everyone’s faves, and for Darryl and Michonne to kiss on the mouth.” We tried to follow up to see if she meant Nichelle Nichols or Zoe Sandaña, but she was already too busy dancing.

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Chibi!Adama. Can’t decide whether to punch him or pinch his cheek.

Gaming Editor and future Future Space Latino Rick G was too busy praying to the Lords of Kobol for Battlestar Galactica: Blood and Chrome to become a full-fledged TV series to give us anything we could use.

Tanya, Managing Editor and Champion Book Stacker, kicked off her list of demands for the next year with a geekdom talk show run by and starring our favorite, Gail Simone. 2013 had better listen if it knows what’s good for it.

She then proceeded to muse on the merits of a Game of Thrones/Quantum Leap cross over series, with Ned Stark leaping from life to life, putting right things that once went wrong, and hoping each time that the next leap will be the leap back to Westeros. While Lois very much agreed (and relished the possibility of Sean Bean in women’s clothing), what she really wants is for Sansa to wrap up the epic series by kneeing Littlefinger in the nads and then ruling all of Westeros as our queen.

Finally, shortly before midnight, and after very little debate, a unanimous agreement was reached that Chris Messina: Vampire Hunter should definitely be a thing.

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Yeah, okay, I get that.

Ministry of Motion Picture Precognition

idris elba pac

What has two thumbs and canceled the Apocalypse?

Tanya has officially put all of Hollywood on notice for the coming year: put Idris Elba in everything. He’s already mostly there. He just needs to be in a few more films, including a major motion picture version of acclaimed BBC cop drama Luther. (As soon as Season 3 airs, thanks.)

batwoman cosplay

Basically, THIS. (cosplay by Alex Abene, photo by Jo Chi Linn, via flickr).

What else would make Tanya happy? (And the universe really should be doing everything in its power to make her happy.) Kate Kane’s Batwoman finally brought to the big (or small) screen! With Greg Rucka writing, and a woman directing, which would be pretty swell.

shanola monica

She used to lead the Avengers, you know. (via itsinthetrees.tumblr.com)

Pulling us aside, Podcast Editor and first Human SPECTRE Elyse, counted off what she’d like to see in cineplexes: “I want a Black Widow origin story, Shanola Hampton as Monica Rambeau in the next Avengers, FemShep to be a WoC in the inevitable Mass Effect film adaptation, and for The Hobbit to be retroactively turned into one or two movies instead of a trilogy.” Elyse then wandered off, saying something about this being her favorite party on the Citadel.

michelle robocop

Yeah, go ahead and do it. Dead or alive, you’re coming with me.

Lois weighed the possibilities of an Inception-style take over of someone in Tinseltown with the following fantastic idea: “a Robocop movie with Michelle Rodriguez as Alej Muñoz, an nth generation Puerto Rican cop who’s offed while investigating OCP’s ties with human trafficking. Don Cheadle as her squad captain and Lucy Liu as Allen, her former partner who discovers Muñoz’s body.” Rick seemed unsure whether this would, or would not, constitute a movie in which Michelle Rodriguez dies before the third act.

Gee… wonder why?

Later in the evening, between dance offs and increasingly heated arguments over the ultimate OTPs, Moxie revealed that she likes to imagine a world in which Pain and Gain wins Best Picture (on all the award shows), and someone finally, finally makes an Animorphs feature film.

While we repeatedly told her it actually doesn’t have anything to do with movies, Mace insists that she is counting the days until the release of the next Malinda Lo novel. She does this mostly by yelling “MOAR LO! MOAR PoC LGBT SCI FI!

gemma doyle

Go buy this now. Geekquality commands you!

Speaking of books, Tanya would also like to see Libba Bray‘s Gemma Doyle Trilogy as a movie, done properly (if at all). Start with casting a young South Asian actor in the role of Kartik (the main protagonist’s complicated love interest), and definitely no skirting over the mature topics in the book (childhood abuse, drug addiction, and sexual orientation). She adds, “It would be an amazing movie, magic, parallel worlds, and petticoats, and all!”

Geekquality’s Shrine to Patron Saint Lucy Liu

lucy boxing

Her royal majesty, Queen Lucy
(Peter Lindbergh/Harper’s Bazaar)

You may have already noticed that, if there’s anyone or anything we’d love to have exist at all points in space-time simultaneously, it’s Lucy Liu. Our love for Ms. Liu borders on the unhealthy, so, unsurprisingly, there was a lot of Liu-talk at the prophesy party.

lucy daniel

Wonder if our Lois is projecting at all.

Lois Payne envisions a Lois Lane movie starring Lucy Liu. “She’s sharp and steely, can deliver subtle bite while remaining approachable, human, and plucky,” our Lois explained. “She’s proven to be the formidable action star in her own right. Daniel Henney can be Clark Kent.” Lois punctuated this pronouncement with a swoon.

Mace says we just should include Lucy Liu in everything, even if it’s just “Lucy Liu plays the quirky neighbor.”

amazing

Right there with you, Ellen.

“Lucy Liu and Ellen Wong (a.k.a. Knives Chau from Scott Pilgrim vs. The World) team up in a Batman/Robin situation.. something… something… something… ASS KICKING!”, shouts Alice Marie while punching the air, just before texting us the following, presumably unrelated bad/good Photoshop:

lucy idris

If this isn’t a thing, it should be a thing.

We really do want Lucy Liu and Idris Elba in everything.

What are you wishing for in geek media and pop culture in 2013? Tell us in the comments!

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2 Responses to Geekquality’s New Year’s Prophecies for 2013

  1. Tanya says:

    Currently in my head trying to create a medley of the GoT/Quantum Leap theme song.

  2. mawhi says:

    Moxie just as recurring? Your dreams can do better than that.

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